Hi to all my partners and more!
I just want to start out by saying thank you all each for your partnership, prayers, and other means of support. It really means the world.
I know in the past, I usually structure my updates with giving brief summaries about different parts of my ministry and life. However, I want to try something a bit new with this update.
Beyond just the logistics of ministry, I want to use this as a platform and opportunity to tell you guys about all the things God has been trying to communicate to me and teach me this month-which has very strongly been through the voices of community and people in my life.
For one, this month, we had Spring Break, which was a complicated time for me in itself. I had expected to spend the majority of the break resting, which very much didn't happen. However, God used that to make me realize just how self reliant I've become this semester. Much like a car engine running on little fuel-that's very much how I felt by Spring Break, to the point that every small thing I had to do or change in my plans led me to feeling overwhelmed. Yet, something God has been trying to communicate to me is the idea that he does want to bless me through this job if I were to let him. I haven't been though, and God has been using this month to show me that.
Out of that time, I've been reflecting more on what it means to rest in God and allow his grace to cover me. With our apprentice evaluations, Pedro, my supervisor, has been encouraging me to think through more what it means to be transparent in the moment with my emotions-which has been more freeing than I ever could imagine. Typically, I'm someone who dwells on my emotions until I've sorted through them and feel comfortable enough to share. This is mainly because I know my raw emotions can stem from pride. However, I'm learning how much more life giving it is to vocalize my emotions despite how hard it is at times because then that gives room for community in my life to speak into them and show me truth. Which, sometimes, ends up being conclusions I can't come to on my own. This has brought new meaning to the 1 John 1 passage for me about living in the light. It isn't just about confessing sins, but about giving room for real life to develop.
Though emotions have been a hard thing for me to tackle, God has been really patient and kind with that. From there, God has been revealing more of the emotions and thoughts I have towards my desire to make people my lord. This looks like people pleasing, wanting affirmation, and desiring to want to look impressive in my job or in my relationships. From that, multiple people have been recommending me the book When People are Big, and God is Small which has left me pondering the idea that out of wanting to be great towards people, I'm essentially wanting to be impressive to God as well. Which is so opposite of the Gospel. My co-worker and friend Jacy also delivered an impactful sermon last Thursday that touched on this.
So, ultimately, this month has been a roller-coaster of lessons and emotions that have led God to digging out even more deeply seeded gunk in my heart.
SSI also occurred this month! And while I want to keep this update mainly about things I've currently been wrestling with-I do feel like this was worth noting! Truly, this was my favorite week of work. These students and staff were such a blessing to the Wylie campus, as we ended up doing 3 days of outreach there for 5 hours each day. David and I ended up meeting so many students! Though this week was long and hectic, it really reminded me how much I love this job and how it really is because of Christ we're able to do what we do. Even more so, it felt like having a family reunion with the students from CCF, our sister ministry. So, I feel like SSI was a serious success and joy to participate in.
Again, thank you all so much for the support this year! It's crazy to think that I only have 2 months left of the apprenticeship. As things wrap up, please be praying for us apprentices as we try to finish the year strong. It really is such an honor to have each of you praying and giving your support. Pioneering Wylie the way we've been able to would not have been able to happen without you.
- The students wrapping up the semester, and that, as finals come, they're able to surrender their anxieties to Christ.
- SICM and the students and staff prepping to go next month.
- Connor and I's wedding as it approaches in June.